Shortly after my dad passed away, my mom was made aware of a Grief Share class that was about to begin and she enrolled in it, encouraging me to do the same. We both started this class less than 3 months after my dad passed, and while I thought it was a bit too soon, I'm glad we did it.
The class was full of some amazing people who had walked the steps that I had been through. The leader was someone I knew from church, although I didn't really know her as a person (and she would later become a friend). This class wasn't just meant for a family member that had passed away, but for divorcees who had lost their marriages, for people who were shunned by their families and didn't have anyone else to turn to and people who had lost loved ones, whether it had been recent or a long time ago.
What I learned from this class is everyone grieves differently. Some people choose to make themselves busy. Some people choose to make shrines. Some people choose to get a tattoo. Some people cry so much that it's hard to get out of bed some days. And some people, like me, know that my loved one is in a better place and while I cry often, it doesn't stop me from what I'm doing or seeing my friends and family.
But, grief is the same for everyone. It's not a contest. For example, you cannot say to me that you hurt more and the grief is more because I lost a parent and you lost a sibling or child. It's the same. Grief is the same. But how we deal with grief can be different for everyone.
I've had a lot of grief in my life. Ten months before my dad passed, his brother passed away rather unexpectedly. My dad wasn't able to go to his service because he had just had shoulder surgery and was in rehab. Then almost two months after my dad passed, his niece also passed (on Christmas day). That was hard. Literally in an entire year's time, I lost 3 very close family members.
Have you ever been to a funeral where there was no hope? I did one time. And it was awful. A co-worker who I thought was a believer turned out not to be, so when she unexpectedly died of pancreatic cancer, no one at her service mentioned Jesus or the hope we have in Him that when we pass, we are united with Him and will live forever. I have that hope. And my dad had that hope. And when he passed, it wasn't a forever goodbye, but just a see you later.
If you are interested in Grief Share, I highly recommend it. You can find a group near you here: https://www.griefshare.org/findagroup.
Comments
Post a Comment